The Discussion

This is what my clinic has named the consultation that most patients refer to as the WTF appointment. 

But first, an update on post-miscarriage beta #2:  The actual number was 280.1.  Down from 1, 210 two weeks ago.  In related news,  my twenty days of bleeding has increased to twenty-five days of bleeding.  No sign of an end in sight.  Every morning discovery of even more bright red blood deflates my soul little by little.  Today, I am in a rotten mood.  Rotten and sick of it.

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The Discussion was worth it??  I don't know.  We were there to review the results of the Chromosome Karyotyping test, immune testing for clotting disorders, recommendations for our next IVF cycle and to discuss how/if the shared risk program will be affected by CCS testing of embryos.

Chromosomes Karyotyping:  Normal for both F and I (as expected).

Immune Clotting: Normal/negative

Recommendations for next IVF:   CCS (which we already knew), 2 embryos for transfers, and possibly a new protocol to be determined after Day 3 testing.  We can have our remaining frozen embryo from IVF #1 thawed and screened with the new embryos as well. 

I have realized that every discussion I have with REs, whether the discussion occurs after hormone test results, baseline scans or failed cycles, contains the phrase, "...which is unusual for your age." 


Your FSH is slightly higher than what is expected for someone in your age group."
Your AMH is a bit lower than what is expected for someone in your age group."
Your antral follicle count is on the lower side for someone in your age group."
CCS testing is more common in our patients who are over the age of forty."

I sort of feel robbed of my thirties.

Shared Risk Program:  Because of CCS, we will not have a fresh transfer.  Rather than lose a transfer included in the program (program includes 3 fresh and 3 frozen transfers) we will instead get 2 frozen transfers for each retrieval.  I did ask if we could, if we wanted, transfer 2 fresh day 5 embryos and test the rest, but we will probably "do it right," as F says, test all the embryos and wait it out a cycle for a frozen transfer. 

It is just unbelievable that this frozen transfer won't happen until November.  July: stop bleeding; August: cycle day 1, baselines scan, birth control pills;  September: IVF;  October: prepare for FET.

Cue bad mood and discouragement.  Where progress and pregnancy seem unattainable.  As does the enjoyment of summer if I can think of nothing but November.  I know I have had these feelings before and they pass just as progress is made.   I am just wallowing in the low point of the wait between miscarriage/failed cycle and cycle day 1.

And I am feeling impatient.  Yuck, this bad mood is the worst!